Back from my HIATUS: Waffle House Interview

I, have been on Hiatus. Which is outrageous for a blogger, but you see friends, unlike some people, who just post about their everyday things....like how I intended to do when I started this, Will ONLY write when I have something Legit to say, or will lose the few readers I have. :-(

So....This is a "amusing anecdote" if you will, about my goal to become a Waffle House Employee, unfortunately.

(To understand the insanity of my choice of shift, let it be known that I have insomnia, so it makes sense...for now)

It started with a phone call, one I never intended to make. I have submitted my application at, I shit you not, 17 different places, to no avail.

I swore that even though the only place that actually had a "Now Hiring!!!" sign was Waffle House, I would never apply because it is, how do you say.....gross? *let it be known that if I get this job I will make sure none of them know I have a blog so this doesn't get me fired* ANYWAYS I figured out that I may need to start doing some UN-fake-adult-like-things. Like getting a job when I need things. I've held out a long time, but this is why I caved and did the Waffle House thing, (which I am getting to, I promise). These are my reasons:

1. Short for tuition.
2. Spending money....I WANT IT.
3. I want to study abroad.
4. I want to go to Panama City or some beach for Spring Break 2012...which will happen because the world will NOT be ending.
5. I need to stop mooching off my parents....they pay most of my shit anyways, you know? I feel guilty for bleeding them dry.
6. MAINLY for number 1 though.

Anyways, I called the WH (waffle house, I am sick of typing it) to ask if there were still openings, which of course there were because, well, it's F***ing WH. She told me in a oddly rude fashion that they were only looking for 3rd shift.

Which she said, and I quote, "is the only shift available, and it is for 2AM-7AM (I wrote it on my hand as she said it, fyi. Remember that for later in this story when I get told that it is really a 10 hour shift). So you probably aren't interested, so have a nice day. But to her apparent displeasure I said, rather loudly "THAT'S PERFECT!" So she told me to come in and fill out a form, blah blah blah.

I go to the WH and fill out the form, which consisted of

What's your name?
Are you 16? <<< that's seriously all it asked about age.
Do you have reliable transportation?
Have you worked at a WH?
Phone Number?
What shift?

THAT'S IT. LITERALLY.

High standards, I know.

The Interview....Part 1

I get a rather awkward phone call from "Joe" which was an ordeal, because apparently he could only do it at 2:30 which is when I have class, so I asked for 2....and he said, and I quote, "Well, I'm usually extremely busy until 2:30, it's a very demanding job, making waffles for people." Apparently people don't eat waffles at 2:30 I guess.

But we agreed on 2:00 and he said that he may be able to see me, but not to count on him being able to take a short break.
........you're the fucking manager, you can take a break you prick.
I arrive at like 5 till 2. (I was literally walking OUT of the waffle house 9 minutes later).

He made me wait while he stood behind the counter, doing nothing but scoping out the waitresses, who were waiting on the 3 customers. he makes time to see me at 2. He was a total dick.
"well, the 3rd shift is actually a 10 hour, from 9PM-7AM" which is fine, I don't care. and then said
"are you prepared to work holidays and weekends? One of the downfalls of working at WH, people need us at all times, you better expect to work about every weekend since you live so close, because the food industry is a demanding bitch, when she wants it she gets it (insert creeper-like laugh)"

Once again, it's F***ing WH. I'm sure it's in high demand at all times.

He had the whole "My self-importance is way to high for my job, so I'm a total prick."

Managing is hard, but Calm The F Down.

He then said "well, I'll call you for a second interview next weekend, I'd shake your hand, but I just got a nasty cut making a waffle, all in a days work." He then preceded to hold up his clearly bloody band-aid clad finger. yummy.

Can't wait for the second interview, if I get a response to this part, I'll be sure to detail interview numero Dos.

What's the Silver Lining? Regardless of the negatives....it's still a job and a paycheck, which is what I want.

That's all folks.

P.S. Views on the trickle effect of shitty jobs coming soon.