Back from my HIATUS: Waffle House Interview

I, have been on Hiatus. Which is outrageous for a blogger, but you see friends, unlike some people, who just post about their everyday things....like how I intended to do when I started this, Will ONLY write when I have something Legit to say, or will lose the few readers I have. :-(

So....This is a "amusing anecdote" if you will, about my goal to become a Waffle House Employee, unfortunately.

(To understand the insanity of my choice of shift, let it be known that I have insomnia, so it makes sense...for now)

It started with a phone call, one I never intended to make. I have submitted my application at, I shit you not, 17 different places, to no avail.

I swore that even though the only place that actually had a "Now Hiring!!!" sign was Waffle House, I would never apply because it is, how do you say.....gross? *let it be known that if I get this job I will make sure none of them know I have a blog so this doesn't get me fired* ANYWAYS I figured out that I may need to start doing some UN-fake-adult-like-things. Like getting a job when I need things. I've held out a long time, but this is why I caved and did the Waffle House thing, (which I am getting to, I promise). These are my reasons:

1. Short for tuition.
2. Spending money....I WANT IT.
3. I want to study abroad.
4. I want to go to Panama City or some beach for Spring Break 2012...which will happen because the world will NOT be ending.
5. I need to stop mooching off my parents....they pay most of my shit anyways, you know? I feel guilty for bleeding them dry.
6. MAINLY for number 1 though.

Anyways, I called the WH (waffle house, I am sick of typing it) to ask if there were still openings, which of course there were because, well, it's F***ing WH. She told me in a oddly rude fashion that they were only looking for 3rd shift.

Which she said, and I quote, "is the only shift available, and it is for 2AM-7AM (I wrote it on my hand as she said it, fyi. Remember that for later in this story when I get told that it is really a 10 hour shift). So you probably aren't interested, so have a nice day. But to her apparent displeasure I said, rather loudly "THAT'S PERFECT!" So she told me to come in and fill out a form, blah blah blah.

I go to the WH and fill out the form, which consisted of

What's your name?
Are you 16? <<< that's seriously all it asked about age.
Do you have reliable transportation?
Have you worked at a WH?
Phone Number?
What shift?

THAT'S IT. LITERALLY.

High standards, I know.

The Interview....Part 1

I get a rather awkward phone call from "Joe" which was an ordeal, because apparently he could only do it at 2:30 which is when I have class, so I asked for 2....and he said, and I quote, "Well, I'm usually extremely busy until 2:30, it's a very demanding job, making waffles for people." Apparently people don't eat waffles at 2:30 I guess.

But we agreed on 2:00 and he said that he may be able to see me, but not to count on him being able to take a short break.
........you're the fucking manager, you can take a break you prick.
I arrive at like 5 till 2. (I was literally walking OUT of the waffle house 9 minutes later).

He made me wait while he stood behind the counter, doing nothing but scoping out the waitresses, who were waiting on the 3 customers. he makes time to see me at 2. He was a total dick.
"well, the 3rd shift is actually a 10 hour, from 9PM-7AM" which is fine, I don't care. and then said
"are you prepared to work holidays and weekends? One of the downfalls of working at WH, people need us at all times, you better expect to work about every weekend since you live so close, because the food industry is a demanding bitch, when she wants it she gets it (insert creeper-like laugh)"

Once again, it's F***ing WH. I'm sure it's in high demand at all times.

He had the whole "My self-importance is way to high for my job, so I'm a total prick."

Managing is hard, but Calm The F Down.

He then said "well, I'll call you for a second interview next weekend, I'd shake your hand, but I just got a nasty cut making a waffle, all in a days work." He then preceded to hold up his clearly bloody band-aid clad finger. yummy.

Can't wait for the second interview, if I get a response to this part, I'll be sure to detail interview numero Dos.

What's the Silver Lining? Regardless of the negatives....it's still a job and a paycheck, which is what I want.

That's all folks.

P.S. Views on the trickle effect of shitty jobs coming soon.

Fuggs: A short blog.

This will be a short entry because it is 1:45 AM.....and I have homework to do still.

I hate Uggs, AKA Fuggs. (EXCEPT the gray ones that are tight and go to the knee with white fur inside and big grey buttons that connect them with fur sticking out, those are ok).

I may have not mentioned this...but I live in this Tundra-like-Waste-Land known to some as "Ohio," which is covered in not 3-5 inches as predicted by the news....but by 6-8 inches of snow. This has caused every female, and some males who are VERY comfortable with their sexuality to bust out the oh-so-hideous Fuggs. What happened to Cute (just so you know I just had a 5-6 minutes sneeze attack in the middle of this) snow boots? I don't care if you water proof them, they aren't made for snow, and look disgusting and dirty when wet. And no. They are not cool, they are the footwear version of the Minivan for moms.....which is hilariously detailed in my FAVORITE blog https://hiccupsandheels.wordpress.com/ they should just never be worn in any way. I just, ugh, I just hate them.

I also hate that I look just as uncool as Fugg wearing girls....because while their feet are ugly but Warm in the snow....Mine look awesome, but are freezing.

I respect that they have the courage to go into public with that hideous footwear.

This is a stupid blog, I just need at least one new person to know how much I dislike Fuggs.

I also hate Onions. A Lot.

That's All Folks!

The Left-Hand-Handicap

Hello again my 3 readers, sorry it's been a few days, back to my life as a fake adult at college.  Already having adjustment issues, but that's another blog brewing in my head, we'll go there another day.

I, like 8% of the world's population, live with what I call the "Left-Handed-Handicap" and it plagues my everyday life.  Here are some challenges I, and my left handed people face daily.

(If you have anything to add lefty's, feel free to comment and I will dedicate a blog to new challenges I forgot to add to this pity party).

Anywho, back to my everyday struggles.

1. The Oh-So-Easy-Manual-Can-Opener.....the one parents buy when they feel like being cheap and not getting electric, while I'm at it I'll start making my own butter. THIS particular item has caused many trees to die by paper towel use.  I can't begin to tell you how many times THIS happened during my childhood/teen years.

I would get out some SpaghettiOs, and go for the 1700s style can opener, and proceed to open my delicious lunch I was making, unprepared for the disaster that was to unfold....in all fairness, my mother brought this upon herself....if she would of just made me grilled cheese, this would never have happened, ever. I would precede to open my can all awkwardly with my right hand, because the can-opener, like most things, is made to be used by right-handed people. During this awkward opening, my awkward grip would slip....flinging the SpaghettiOs all over the counter, floor, me, (once my poor cat was a victim), and anything else within a 5 foot radius EXCEPT my bowl.  Not fair, a mess, no SpaghettiOs, feeling stupid for not being able to open a can of food.

2. Scissors.....the bane of my existence.....they make left-handed ones.....BUT not in kindergarden....when I was the one being sent to slow class because I was too uncoordinated to cut on the dotted lines. I am traumatized.

3. COLLEGE CLASSROOM DESKS....AHHHH!!! Ok, so I'm in Astronomy class today....which is in an actual planetarium, so the seats are leaned back quite a bit. now these seats have those stupid yet apparently effective build in mini-desks on the right side.  Normally, I can awkwardly reach across....which is inconvenient but doable. But not in this seat, oh no, this classroom has those laid back seats, so I can't reach far enough over to use the Biased desk, forcing me to stay leaned back....holding my notebook in the air. Not what I would call an appealing position.

4. This isn't really the world dissing my lefties....BUT because our hands drag over our writing...it makes the side of our hands dark from the lead or ink....and don't even talk about dry erase boards or chalk boards.....or using Sharpies/markers on anything....instant mess.

Hope you enjoyed this odd insight, I want to make a store that sells only Left-handed products....but tell no one...so when Right-handed people buy things and take them home.....they will be in a state of utter confusion as to why their kitchen and possibly their cat are covered in SpaghettiOs.

That's All Folks!

My New Life As A Fake Adult

So, it's a New Year.  What's changed? Well, nothing yet, but I'm hoping for the best.

I'm a freshman at college......what I like to call the "Bittersweet, Beautiful Nightmare" that is my life right now.  The freedom, friends, and new places, are the Beauty of it all.  The work, bills, too much on my plate, and Midnight calls to Mommy "I just can't do this, I want to come home," are what I like to call The Nightmare portion of my new life.

It's been 4 months, and I've made great friends, and lost some too.  It's a crazy journey that I'm going to stumble through, and I think I'm ready.....I guess. lol.

Now back to me being a fake adult.  I'm at college, living on my own, making my own decisions, living the so-called "Dream," so to speak.  But I've come to realize that I, regardless of the legality of my adulthood,  am a child. I like to say "I'm an adult now *whine whine whine* I can run my own life now *whine whine whine*  so stop telling me I need to buckle down Mom! *whine whine whine* By the way....what's for dinner? Meatloaf again!?!? *whine whine whine*" I'm still being taken care of, I'm not on my own, and I can barely make a doctors appointment, yet I, and many others like me, think that we are real adults.

All of these new responsibilities, and I've still not gotten a handle on it yet. Despite these things, I'm still trying to prove myself, to myself. Will I succeed? Eventually. Will it be soon? Probably not. But that's the silver lining to this new revelation of fake adulthood, regardless of my helplessness now, I will aspire to what I want to be, because tomorrow....is a new day!

Oh P.S......when I become a real adult, you'll be the first to know! I'll keep you Posted!!